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From this link: http://yesmeansyesblog.wordpress.com/2011/05/02/domism-role-essentialism-and-sexism-intersectionality-in-the-bdsm-scene/
Domism: Role Essentialism and Sexism Intersectionality in the BDSM Scene

by Thomas

Archimedes said that if he had a lever long enough, he could move the world. But where would he stand? It would be nice if some subculture sat outside every negative social dynamic, every kyriarchal oppressive dynamic, in pristine isolation, free of taint. It would be nice, but none can. And so the things that are wrong with the world are wrong with the BDSM community, and more specifically, with the formal community, the organizations and public parties: the Scene.
This is study in intersection. Among this relatively small group who are non-mainstream in one very specific respect, there are repetitions of and reactions to the oppressive patterns of the larger culture, but they’re not entirely straightforward. Partiarchal and heterosexist pattern manifest in some ways, power dynamics reorient themselves along BDSM role lines in other ways, and those things interact in ways that are completely unique to the BDSM community. There are other interactions, of course. I can’t encompass them all, partly for length and partly because, frankly, my grasp of some things is not good enough to try to write about them — so, for example, on the intersection of race and other dynamics with BDSM, or cisnormativity and cissexism, I can only refer to the writing of others.* I want to focus on a fairly tight set of issues here, which center on what I’ll call “domism” and how it interacts with patriarchy in the pansexual scene (I’ll explain the scope of the term below).
I’m focusing on the Scene for a number of reasons, but foremost because I have material about it that isn’t just my say-so. There have been two major academic ethnographies of the formal BDSM communities, by two different researchers, in two different cities, in the last decade. In a thinly-veiled New York she calls Caeden, Dr. Stacy Newmahr did participant fieldwork in the clubs from 2002 to 2006, work she published as Playing On The Edge, recently out from Indiana Universtiy Press. The other is unpublished. Dr. Margot D. Weiss did fieldwork with the Society of Janus and the attendant public scene in San Francisco in the years leading up to 2005, when she completed her dissertation, Techniques of Pleasure, Scenes of Play: SM In The San Francisco Bay Area. Though unpublished, it is available here, but unfortunately not free.
I’ll be blunt about what I mean by the “pansexual BDSM scene,” which I’ll call The Scene, and I don’t expect that either author would subscribe to this definition — though I’m not saying they wouldn’t. The Scene is the community of BDSMers in major cities oriented around heterosexual men, and heterosexual, heteroflexible and bisexual women. Overlap, particularly in play environments, between gay men’s and lesbian scenes and The Scene is limited, and while queer men and lesbian women are not excluded, they’re marginal within these spaces. Anyone who tells you different is trying to sell you something.
Domism
All the things I want to talk about intersect — this post is about how they’re not entirely separable — so it’s easiest to start at the conclusion. In The Scene, it’s often the case that the social spaces — I’m not talking about the BDSM play itself, but the social interaction of the participants outside the bounds of play — privilege dominants and devalue submissives. As I’ll discuss below, part but only part of this is that more of the dominants are men and more of the submissives are women; the way men who bottom are treated sheds a lot of light but also adds a lot of complexity to how we should understand these dynamics.
I’m borrowing the term “domism”, which as far as I know was coined by one of Weiss’s informants:

There is overlap here between sexism and what Gretchen calls “domism”: the sense that “dominants are somehow more valid people than submissives.” Teramis agreed, noting that it was sometimes unclear if someone was being sexist or “D/s presumptive”: do “you think you can order me to get you a drink” because I am submissive “or is it cause you’re a sexist pig anyway and you would do it to any women who was standing there?”

Weiss p. 246 at n.16.
My definition is a bit broader. When I say “domism” I mean social structures within a sexual community that privilege dominants and devalue submissives outside of explicitly negotiated power exchanges. This takes a lot of forms, among them the pathologizing of bottoms and subs; and non-play role-policing and presumption.
Since I’ve started using the terms “submissive” and “dominant”, now is as good a time as any to talk about terminology. In most posts and in life I use “top” and “bottom” as the umbrella terms, to encompass but extend beyond the respective included concepts of “dominant” and “submissive.” If I’m defining the terms, I’ll use Lee Harrington’s definitions (from the glossary of this book):

Bottom: The giving or receiving partner in a dynamic, the person experiencing the sensations, actions, or activities; in gay male culture, the sexually penetrated partner
Dominant: The willful partner in a dynamic, the person whose ideas and desires are being followed. AKA: Dom, Dominant Partner
Submissive: The submitting or yielding partner in a dynamic, the person who follows the ideas and desires of another individual. AKA: Sub, Submissive Partner
Top: The giving partner in a dynamic, the person doing or applying the sensations, actions, or activities. In gay male culture, the sexually penetrating partner.

Some people use “dominant” and “submissive” to include “top” and “bottom” because they’re more intuitive for new readers, which is a choice I understand but bristle at. Some people use “dominant” and “submissive” to include or replace “top” and “bottom” because they think that dominance and submission are better or more real, and what I really think is that these ideas should die in a fire and be buried under a headstone that reads “Total Power Exchange.” These prejudices towards power exchange are part of the problematic dynamics I’m describing, but since I’m talking about belief systems that operate around dominance and submission and prefer to ignore or devalue “mere” topping and bottoming, I’ll frequently use dominant and submissive as my operative terms below. I’ll add that for myself, I don’t use the term “submissive” as a noun, but sometimes as an adjective to describe my bottoming style. In practice I switch something close to 50-50.
Weiss writes about the pathologizing:

Stephanie and Anthony, both bisexual dominants, discuss prejudice toward submissives; Stephanie argues that being submissive is “equated with weakness.” Unlike the assumptions made about dominants (or in contrast to the lack of pathologizing assumptions made about dominants), there must be “some reason” for being submissive, reasons Anthony elaborates as “you’re fat or you were abused as a child … or there’s something missing or there’s something that’s not quite right … or that you can’t say no.” While Stephanie and Anthony mean their comments to refer to both men and women, as Stephanie continues, her example is of a male submissive: “there are all sorts of — you’re right — this pathologizing thing, ‘well, why would he want to do that sort of thing?’” The implicit answer here, of course, is that the kind of man who might be submissive isn’t a real man, isn’t a masculine man. There is nothing “wrong” with a woman who enjoys submission. As Homi Bhabha argues, this masculinity is anxious, caught between dual imperatives (father/mother, fort/da) and mired in what he describes as “compulsion and doubt.”

Weiss at 249 (internal citation omitted, bold mine).
It’s worth noting that claiming that there’s something broken in submissives — or in submissive men — amounts to an argument for etiology, yet there’s no consensus on why we have the kinks we do in the BDSM community, and no answer at all from the research, what little there is. There’s a plain inconsistency between sometimes very smart and well-informed people knowing and saying that there’s no available answer to why we do what it is that we do, and then saying (usually among our own) that we know why subs are subs.
This gets personal for me. I can’t tell you why I have the kinks I do, but I can tell you what I get out of bottoming. The challenge, the difficulty, the trust, the violation of gender and social norms with a partner, all amount to one thing: a site of tremendous intimacy, a shared physical end emotional journey where I am vulnerable to and connected with my partner … like jumping off a cliff. So that’s my answer.
What these prejudices amount to is a normalizing and centering of the experience of the dominant in The Scene. One way this is apparent is by the overrepresentation of tops or dominants among presenters. Presentations tend to be about skills, often bondage and painplay skills, and there’s a perception that it’s easier for the top to teach these skills. I don’t entirely agree with that perception, but between the overrepresentation of men among tops in The Scene, and the tendency for tops to do the teaching, that means that male tops to most of the talking. As one of Weiss’s informants put it: “[Janus is a] het male dom group. Every single presentation I’ve ever been to, every class I’ve ever taken … across the board, het dom male.” (Weiss at p. 241 n. 14.)
Maymay tells a story about presenting with a partner somewhere: he’s a bottom, and his partner started out by singletailing his back. And then the audience expected her to stop and start explaining what she had shown. But instead, Maymay, the bottom, started explaining what she was doing, as a top, and what he was doing, as a bottom. It’s a paired activity. It makes perfect sense that the bottom can explain skills for a paired activity. Topping a singletail scene means knowing something about both how to top it and what to expect from the bottom, and vice versa, but the ingrained expectation that tops teach skills was so great that the audience kept looking at the top, expecting her to take over.
Lots of Dominant Men, Lots of Submissive Women
One of the reasons that it’s hard to separate out what is plain old sexism from what is domism is that men are overrepresented among tops in The Scene and women among bottoms. In Weiss’s sample:

Among my interviewees, for example, the majority of heterosexual women identified as bottom/submissive (71%), while the majority of heterosexual men identified as top/dominant (75%). Further, only 14% of the heterosexual women were top/dominant; 6% of the heterosexual men identified as bottom/submissive (see Table 1). Although most everyone will immediately point out that so-and-so is a female dominant, or so-and-so a male submissive, my observation in the pansexual SM scene supported this general trend: most heterosexual couples are male dominant, female submissive.

Weiss pp. 239-41 (table and footnote 14 on historical makeup of Janus and the BDSM community omitted). She continues:

One critical way the real intrudes uncomfortably into the scene is though gender stereotypes. While some of my interviewees argued that here there was less sexism in the scene than in real life, most interviewees described sexist and heterosexist assumptions around gender. The most common for this took is the assumption that women were (naturally) submissive and men were (naturally) dominant. Donald, simultaneously distancing himself from and endorsing this assumption, told me:

If you walk into Castlebar on the night of a party and you stripped everybody naked so nobody had collars on or wore their floggers … the vast majority of the people there would assume that men are tops and women are bottoms. It’s just the way it usually plays out. There are notable exceptions on both sides, lots of beautiful bottom boys, lots of really interesting top women. But you know, stereotypes and generalizations exist for some purpose. So the sexism itself might come where if a woman walked in clothed but not wearing a collar and a stereotypical heterosexual dominant male were to notice her, he would probably assume she was submissive because she was female.

Weiss, p. 246.
Weiss notes that this distribution might be particular to her informants and Janus as an organization. In truth, I know of no good gender breakdown of roles in the the pansexual BDSM community broadly, or in The Scene in any city, and those proportions seem like they might be more skewed than would be true of New York — Newmahr doesn’t give figures. One blog has summarized the research, but the demographics are guesswork. I’ll say this though: the “best guess” at Kinkresearch has both men and women more evenly distributed across the role spectrum than what Weiss observed. I suspect this has much to do with the culture of the organizations that dominate The Scene in various cities, and varies accordingly.
All The Sexism Of The Rest Of The World, Plus The Vulnerability …
The interaction of domism and sexism in an environment where most of the women are bottoms and most of the men tops makes it impossible to neatly separate the sexism and the domism. As one might expect, Weiss’s male informants were less conscious of these dynamics, but the women reported them consistently.

Most of the women I interviewed agreed that many men, particularly heterosexual newcomers, made certain gendered assumptions: all women are submissive, there is one way to be a good submissive, and submissives have “issues” that dominants don’t have. Bonnie explained that, as an Asian-American, “I get a lot of men talking to me as if I’m supposed to be quiet and submissive, and I’m not necessarily quiet nor submissive; that can be really frustrating. Or people brushing me off because I happen to be female, even. Lenora and Gretchen, both submissives, complained that others have accused them of not being “real submissives,” or have expressed surprise over their SM orientations because they have strong opinions, are articulate, socially assertive or, as Lenora put it, “basically because I’m not a doormat.“**

Weiss pp. 245-46. Footnote 16, quoted above, omitted here. Weiss’s informants sometimes differentiate between roles in BDSM play iteself, and in Scene social spaces which are not themselves BDSM play:

In [one] exchange, Stephanie is arguing that within a play scene, sexism is mitigated through the enforcement of rules of consent, negotiation, safewording and other forms of regulation and control. However, she differentiates this scene/play from the scene as a social space; there, she argues, men are likely to assume that women are submissive, and further, to create a (one-way) relationship of dominance (through inappropriate touching, or through language) with these women. Although Anthony doesn’t see this form of sexism, most female interviewees (and some male interviewees) agreed that there was a persistent assumption that women in the scene were submissive.

Weiss p. 247 (bold mine).
Role Essentialism: It Persists Most Among Those Who Most Should Know Better
We’ve got a model of sexual orientation — it fits some people and not others, but it’s entrenched and politically useful — that says that it’s inborn and, more to the point for my purposes, static; unchanging over the course of one’s adult life. It’s also politically useful for BDSMers to invoke the orientation model. I’ll just say that discussion of whether our kinks are innate is beyond the scope of this discussion. What seems to travel with that idea, though, is the idea that our BDSM role orientation is fixed and static. That idea seems to persist in the way people often talk about BDSM role orientation — top or bottom, submissive or dominant — even though the more we know about it the more evidence we have that it isn’t true. Newmahr takes this head-on:

[A]lthough it is common for people to top when they had previously only bottomed or vice versa, the typical response highlights essentialist views of identity: “I knew you were really a switch!” References to fixed SM identities waiting to be discovered are also typical, such as “a submissive and doesn’t know it yet,” or a “top who can’t admit it.”
Despite these essentialist beliefs, SM identities are also understood as changing over time… Stories about identity in the scene very often include change, and identification shifts are both recognized and encouraged, even as members adhere to essentialist ideas about identities. The essentialism shifts from particular SM identifications to more profound identities as SM and not-SM (kinky versus vanilla) and allows for flexibility in the particular SM roled. The fluidity of identity is not an implicit contradiction in the analytical construct of identity, but an indicator of the importance of the possibilities for meaningful change in selfhood throughout the life course.”

Newmahr, p. 49 (internal citation omitted, bold mine).
Role Policing
What comes with role essentialism is role policing: folks in Scene social spaces acting as though one’s play role orientation is not only fixed but should manifest outside of play — acting as if being submissive should be constraining, and as though dominance is a status that can be lost (strongly echoing of performative femininity and masculinity, obviously). Newmahr writes:

When I began my fieldwork, I intended to bottom rather than top. My options for play were thus limited to people who topped, and I therefore needed to identify as something in order to play. because the question int he community was most commonly phrased, “Are you a dominant or a submissive?” I identified myself as the latter (and as a researcher). While I was so identified, I observed several instances of policing submissive identity, a practice that I interpreted (and continue to interpret) as profoundly misogynistic, particularly since they have been most often initiated by dominant-identified men.
The most ubiquitous example posits assertiveness as inconsistent with submission. Once, when I articulated a point in a heated conceptual debate, a member of the group asked me whether I was sure I was a submissive. Another time I asked a companion (a top-identified man) to order my coffee while I went to the restroom, prompting another person at the table to exclaim, “Hey, I thought you were a sub!“
On still another occasion, I went to retrieve my coat from a booth at the club. Catherine was sitting between it and me. When I asked her to let me by so that I could reach it, Hugh (a dominant-identified man) suggested that I crawl under the table for it.

Newmahr pp. 78-79 (bold mine). She continues:

In some circles, there are different protocols for speaking to submissives than to dominants, and it is common for dominants to ask one another’s permission to speak to “their” submissives. Other lines are drawn less formally, but jokes intended to humiliate, objectify or silence submissives are normative.

Newmahr p. 79. She’s talking about things that happen outside of play, which really amount to an attempt to impose the dynamics of play outside the negotiated boundaries. I’m not going to sugar-coat this: It’s unethical.
One True Way-ism
One True Way-ism is the play equivalent to role policing in the social interactions of The Scene. It’s almost comical that in a community where any attempt to discuss the moral or social implications is immediately countered with “You’re saying your kink is not okay!” (it even has a common abbreviation, YKINOK), some of the same people will also tell others that they’re doing their kinks wrong. Some folks can seriously make statements that a “true dominant” this, a “true submissive” that … Fortunately, my experience is that these statements are frequently challenged, in the Scene and in online spaces, and sometimes (rightly) ridiculed. But there are still widely held prejudices that some kinds of kinks are more authentic or real or better than others. Newmahr writes:

While discussing a scene I had done, both Russ (dominant-identified) and Elliot (switch-identified) were baffled by my approach to play. Russ asked me, “Don’t you want to please your top?” Elliot was surprised when he realised that my objective in playing with him was not to make him “happy.”
Realizing that “submissive” carried with it a slew of meanings and messages I had not intended, I abandoned “submissive” identification within three weeks. By then, I was angry about my interactions with many dominant-identified men and deeply troubled by the misogynistic overtones. Interestingly, I was also impatient to begin topping, for the sole purpose of claiming an identification as a switch, thereby ending these particular frustrations.

Newmahr pp. 78-79 (bold mine).
Newmahr isn’t alone in shopping for a BDSM role that will cause her less grief in the social spaces of The Scene. One friend (I’ll call her Tigrerra because my kids watch a lot of Bakugan) who leans top but does switch, tells me that when she started playing in a major city public scene, she came out in “full domme armor” to ward off the sexist invasions and bullshit that switch- or bottom-identified women face. This issue isn’t new; in the early 1990s I remember Usenet group posts by top-identified women in The Scene complaining about the assumptions that they were submissives and the nonconsensual and invasive behavior that sometimes came with it.
On Fetlife, the BDSM social networking behemoth, there are groups such as Not Only D&S to counteract this and create spaces for people whose bottoming isn’t necessarily submission or whose topping isn’t necessarily dominance. But there are a lot of folks who still hold the stated or unstated opinion that submission ranks somehow above “mere” masochism and that there’s something unseemly or less authentic about “service topping.” One would think there’s no room for “should” in the sex-positive agenda, but in The Scene, “should” hangs on like stubborn mold.
Newmahr writes about the attitude that there’s a hierarchy of play styles, and I agree with her assessment, though certainly there is significant counterforce to these views:

Much like service topping, badass bottoms occupy the lowest status among bottoms; terms like “do-me bottom” and “just a masochist” illustrate the perspective that without claims to powerlessness, SM play is less meaningful. As with service topping among tops, badass bottoms are also more likely than other bottoms to be switches. The lower relative status of switches in the scene, then, is not, as is commonly understood, simply about switching itself, but about the challenges that switches pose to the top/bottom-man/woman paradigm that underlies much of SM play.
There is truth in the argument that topping symbolizes (male) dominance and bottoming (female) submission. Most simply understood, topping and bottoming are ways of doing masculinity and femininity, respectively. Even as they symbolically recreate a gendered system, however, the complexity within SM play, and play across genders, problematizes the understanding of SM as a categorical reinforcement of gender inequality.

Newmahr 115. My view, backed up by Weiss’s observations, is that this reaction to threats to the paradigm expresses itself perhaps most starkly as prejudice against and devaluation of men who bottom, particularly submissive men.
Gender Role Violation: Men Bottoming
“Tom explained that “there are party groups in which I’m marginally tolerated because I’m a sub.”" Weiss, p. 247. That’s not a reference to me, but my first contacts with The Scene (long before Newmahr’s New York fieldwork) ran into some of this. Being a young guy more interested in bottoming than topping was … a suboptimal experience. I sort of quickly became more interested in paying attention to the political projects of the BDSM community than looking for play partners in The Scene. Maymay, another bottom-identified guy, has said much the same thing, about much the same scene, at the time of Newmahr’s fieldwork.
The comfortable assumption (for some) that scene role hierarchy replicates gender-role hierarchy is one that goes unstated, but one that a lot of folks — particularly some het male doms — don’t want to see challenged:

Carrie told me that her husband (and other men) enjoyed being in a group of all male dominants and female submissives because “they feel uncomfortable” and “would rather not be around” couples that play differently. By this, she means “he would not want to be next to a woman topping a guy or a gay male couple,” both “styles” of play that challenge the parallel construction of gender/sexuality. The homophobia of some of the heterosexual men in the pansexual scene reflects anxiety about maintaining appropriate masculinity; it is the community expression of what many have theorized about masculinity. If proper masculinity is fundamentally about heterosexuality and the disavowal of homosexuality, then it makes sense that for some men (in a scene and in everyday life), gay male sexuality or female dominant sexuality are two related scenes of horror.

Weiss, p. 248. It is the men, and their anxious masculinity, that police this, not women’s discomfort with submissive men. A man who bottoms is so discomfiting to some men that one of Weiss’s respondents said it cost him friendships:

Understanding other men as the enforcers and arbiters of masculinity/access to power, Phil, a heterosexual switch, told me:

I was a 24/7 bottom to [his wife]: we had a monogamous relationship for three years, I was her slave and she was my mistress, and we had very formal things going on, like contracts … I enjoyed it a lot — that intensity of 24/7 … After I became known as a submissive, a lot of my male friends that were switches or tops didn’t like me now. There’s a lot of prejudice of male tops — even gay male tops – against submissives. You don’t see it unless it’s right there in front of you … It was funny, I lost a lot of apparent respect as soon as they found out I was a male bottom. I still find that … I still find it a lot with the newbies, especially the het male tops, they can’t even conceive of a women being dominant …
MW: I wondered about that.
Phil: Well, it’s true! Some of the closest people would suddenly walk right off from me. I lost some very good male friends. I tried to help them, “I’m not any different than I was a month ago” …
MW: Do you think it’s a gender thing”
Phil: … Yeah, in a way, it’s something that men seem to have trouble with it, but I think it’s because of the social station that society puts men at.

The prejudice Phil faced as a male bottom is related to the ways that, although the scene is a special, bracketed place, desire is formed through and around our social experiences of power and gender. ”Desire,” as Anne Allison notes, “is both of and beyond the everyday.”

Weiss pp. 249-50 (internal citation omitted; editorial marks and elisions within the transcribed quote Weiss’s, except bold, which is mine).
These are not dynamics unique to The Scene, or to BDSM communities. They’re dynamics from outside our communities that manifest within them in ways that are unique. Men who bottom are an (to use Butlerian terminology, see here) abject identity, a specter that terrifies many men outside the BDSM community. When I’ve described things I do as a bottom, those descriptions have occasionally been picked up — with comic revulsion and summary dismissal — on “men’s rights activist” fora.
Weiss concludes:

Further, the tendency for SM orientation to echo polarized gender is stronger for men than for women, and differences between sexual orientation make a difference as well. In my interviews, heterosexual male bottoms felt, and were seen as, a little off, funny or queer. In part, this assumption is based on the linking of the abject position – submissive – with women, although it also reflects the fear/disavowal of homosexuality at [sic] the basis of dominant masculinity.”

Weiss p. 249 (bold mine). Weiss, a lesbian, is not using the word “queer” accidentally here. I read her to consciously parallel the reaction to het men who bottom with gay men. The particularized sexist domism male bottoms face shares common dynamics with homophobic fixation on gay men’s sexual practices. That fixation including especially the fascination with the receptive or enveloping partner in insertive sex acts. It is not at all coincidental that the term “bottom” is used both in the BDSM community and by vanilla gay men.
(The limits of my analysis are glaring here. Because of both the limitations of my experience and of the source material I was working with, I have not attempted to extend any of this to the gay male leather community, though I’d say I have a better groundiing in that literature than most het readers do. I also don’t have a good handle on the ways that trans folks’ experiences intersect with the dynamics I’ve written about. I know anecdotes, but I can’t begin to analyze how transphobia plays into the reflexive discomfort people have with play dynamics that upset their settled assumptions. Suffice it to say that I know lots of kink spaces, online and real world, are deeply uncomfortable places for kinky trans folks, and if there’s an analysis of the interplay between scene role essentialism, sexism, and cissexism, transphobia, transmisogyny, etc., please somebody link it in comments.)
It Doesn’t Have To Be This Way
There is no point outside kyriarchal structures, not that any of us can access. But that’s a problem for every aspect of social justice work, and the answer to that is never, “well, maybe we should just give up.” We all believe that it is possible, in our imperfect ways, to own our shit and make the world around us better and less shitty. So I don’t say any of this to excoriate The Scene, but to exhort folks in BDSM communities to not replicate the injustices of the wider world unthinkingly, and instead to thing about them and push back.
I could end on a vague rhetorical note here, but I’d rather be practical. Here’s what I think folks ought to do:
Recognize and facilitate our diversity. It’s fine for men to want to top or women to want to bottom, but the assumption that that’s the case is self-replicating because it marginalizes and pushes out people who don’t fit that model. Folks need to stop assuming that women are bottoms or subs.
Stop The Role Policing. Jokes that take as their premise that bottoms should be subs, and should be submissive when they’re not playing and with people they’re not playing with are not funny. They’re toxic.
There Is No One True Way. Bottom != submissive. Pain play != power exchange. If you find someone explaining how something is more real or deep or true or important than how someone else does it, you can safely dismiss what they have to say.
Bottoms Are Not Broken. Where would tops be without them? Not having much fun. One side of the kink is no weirder or more in need of explanation than the other.
*Weiss has an entire chapter on The Scene and race, focusing not only on the relatively small proportion of People of Color in the Bay Area Scene, but also on the racialized images of BDSM. It’s Chapter 6 of her dissertation and it’s an engaging read. Neither Weiss nor Newmahr deal with cisnormativity in any direct way, but there are some good writers around who are both trans and kinky. I’ll recommend in particular Asher Bauer, who writes at Tranarchism.
**Though it’s beyond the scope of this already lengthy post, this is another intersection that can’t be neatly untangled. Bonnie’s experiences of sexism and role policing are informed by a fetishizing, racist narrative about Asian (stereotypically East Asian) women. The experiences of people of color in being caricatured into racialized narratives around a particular gender, race, role and sometimes sexual orientation stand at intersections of multiple kyriarchal equalities, and the choice to deal in thos post with role and gender primarily is, in that sense, an arbitrary one. Another writer might just as well address the intersection of race and BDSM role (and some have; I am thinking here of Tina Portillo and Mollena Williams, though I don’t have specific pieces handy to cite) and footnote gender as an additional factor.

Why the Government Won’t Legalize Marijuana

The legalization of marijuana has been a heated debate in the news over the past few years with valid arguments on both sides of the issue, but I feel as if the advantages greatly outweigh the disadvantages. Legalizing marijuana is not only economical but beneficial health wise to the population of well, any country. Look how many western nations have already caught on to that idea (Amsterdam for example), and are profiting from it.

For a second, let’s give up all the notions we’ve been fed about marijuana through several media outlets about the fact that it is a ‘drug’ and the idea that drugs are bad (through our conditioning). Did you ever think about the fact that cigarettes are just as or even more harmful to your health and yet they’re still legal?


What makes marijuana so bad that it can’t be legalized? It’s definitely not the idea that marijuana is bad for your health because if it was bad for your health, it wouldn’t be prescribed for medical purposes. In fact, medical research has proven several benefits of marijuana use including treatment for glaucoma, multiple sclerosis, and the obvious fact that it is both anti-emetic (prevents nausea) and used for pain relief. For those concerned about the health effects due to smoking marijuana, remember, smoking is not the only way to enjoy marijuana benefits, you can also eat it or even vaporize it.

In fact, many economists are trying to push the legalization of marijuana because they believe it will help bring up the drowning economy of the United States. Most people may not realize it, but the United States spends billions of tax payers dollars fighting the so called “drug war” when there are so many more important issues at hand. I mean, let the people who want to smoke marijuana smoke marijuana peacefully, how is it bothering you? If the fact that you are not earning any tax dollars off illegal sales is bothersome, then just legalize it and tax it.

Since 0.5 grams of marijuana is sold on the streets for about $8.60 and its production price is only $1.70 – that means that the legal selling price could be much lower than the street selling price, giving people incentive to purchase legally. Taxing marijuana and saving money on the drug war could actually profit the US economy greatly.

So if there are so many advantages to legalizing marijuana, why doesn’t the government follow through with it? Why does it not have enough support to push it through?

It should be noted that whether you legalize marijuana or not, people will continue to utilize it illegally, costing the governments billions of dollars in attempting to fight it. There are not many disadvantages to legalizing marijuana, and minimal health effects as you cannot overdose on the drug.

The only possible negative health effect is the long term effect on the hippocampus which retains memory in the brain. Research has shown that excessive marijuana smoking can cause damage to the brain, but again that comes down to freedom. People are aware that cigarettes cause cancer and have many negative effects but continue to smoke it – the only requirement being health hazards being posted on the packs (in Canada only). Why couldn’t the same precautions be provided whilst legalizing marijuana and then have the people make their own decisions – give the people the choice to live their own lives.

“Legalizing marijuana will raise too many health hazards which will raise the health care costs” – a totally untrue statement. People smoke cigarettes which cause more health damage and thus increase the need for medical attention, raising medical costs, whereas marijuana wouldn’t drastically increase health care costs (with the new health care bill coming up), possibly decrease health care costs and even help people quit smoking. Besides, there are plenty of healthy ways to smoke marijuana.


Ultimately, the reason the government does not want to legalize marijuana is because it would be impossible to prevent illegal sales even if it was legalized. I doubt they’re worried about the health concerns (minimal) that follow with the usage of marijuana – so most of their concern lies with how to have high prices whilst taxing it and prevent illegal sales. Medical marijuana currently sells for equal to or more than street prices, and if it were legalized, why would people purchase it for the same as street price and pay tax on it rather than purchase it illegally tax free.

I believe that is the greatest reason that the government is hesitant in legalizing marijuana, otherwise, I believe, it would have been pushed forward long ago. Such a petty concern however, should not prevent the government from pursuing an action that will ultimately benefit the nation, because people will continue to use marijuana for leisure purposes, whether it be legally or illegally.

You Know You're all into BDSM When.....

...you keep fake hanging plants around the house, just so your mother will never know what all those hooks in the ceiling are really for

...you realized you've charged more in lingerie than you get paid in a year

...you have more toys than your kids

...you take up macrame, just to learn some new knots

...you start rating your CDs by how interesting it'll be to beat someone to

...someone asks how long you've been doing this ponygirl routine, and you snort and start to stamp your foot

...your favorite dessert is hot crossed buns...and you don't eat sweets

...someone says they have a leatherman, you almost say "me too!" before you realize they are talking about the tool gadget on their belt.

...you watch a movie where someone gets tied up and scream at the screen, "Gimme a break, 3 minutes max to get out of that!"

...you go to the local county fair and salivate when the horsejumps are set up.

...you have a list by the phone for the babysitter....Hospital, Family, and 3 24-hour locksmiths.

...you are on a first-name basis with all the local EMT's.

...you have the closest 24 hour locksmith as #1 on your speed dial list.

...you join the SCA just so you can learn to make your own chainmail and work with leather!

....you speak of crop rotation with someone, and they aren't a farmer.

...you try to get arrested, just for the handcuffs , body cavity search, humiliation scene and time in the cage.

...Avon tells you stop writing, they are not going to make eau d'leather aftershave

...vanilla means anything BUT a flavoring for ice cream!

...leather companies start giving you the wholesale to distributor discount.

...you can't pass a candle factory without drooling (or wetting your seat)

...your kids ask you about conditioning leather....and it takes you a minute to realize they are talking about their baseball gloves.

..."chain letter" has a whole different meaning to you.

...you haunt the dollar stores for "pervertibles"

...you've got a toy chest bigger than the one in your 6 year old son's room.

...the local Leather hobby shop offers you a business account.

...your children ask if they can borrow your "costumes" for Halloween.

...your body piercings set off the metal detectors at the court house.

...you need two separate packing and moving crews....one to pack and move the furniture and belongings, and the other to pack and move the "furniture" and "belongings".

...you choose your new house based on it's location: convenient to the leather store, easily directed to by your friends and the local ambulance drivers, and just a mile from the emergency room.

...you become a locksmith to avoid having to make embarassing calls at 2 A.M.

...the local Home Depot has set you up with a business account...and you are not a contractor or an electrician.

...you move to another city, and the hardware store in your old hometown goes out of business because you don't buy there anymore.

...escape artists come to you for advice.

...you say Vanilla like it's a bad word.

...you can't pass by an iron fence without drooling.

...you know the location of every tack shop in the tri-state area.

...your idea of getting a jump in the morning is to hook up the other end of your nipple clamp to the car battery.

...you nearly cause an accident pulling into the lot where the sign advertises FREE TODAY HOT WAX before you realize it's a car wash.

...you cannot get through the opening lines of "Green Eggs and Ham" (I Am Sam, Sam I Am) without giggling hysterically.

...your attitude is "electricity, not just a utility, but a way of life".

...you've served more people than McDonald's.

...more people have seen your body on-line than have visited www.cnn.com

...you spend more time on your knees than a Catholic priest.

...you consider filing a lawsuit for false advertising when the pizza place has a sign for HOT GREEK-STYLE SUBS but they wouldn't bend over to please you.

...you chose your last car based on the location of the garment hooks.

...the hospital lists you as a triage center, since you're better equipped than the ER.

...you sit on Santa's lap to tell him the toys you want for XMas, and get a free trip on the North Pole.

...you buy clothespins in the supersize family economy bags, and you don't have a family or a clothesline.

...there's enough rope in your bedroom to scale Mt. Everest.

...you find yourself wandering through the wax museum's medieval torture chamber making comments like "gimme a break, my Dom's grandmother could get out of that!"

...getting tattooed and pierced is merely foreplay.

...you bought a souvenir replica of the Washington Memorial because you were too cheap to go to the adult store and get a real butt plug.

...you think Hannibal Lecter is a snazzy dresser.

...someone tries to talk you out of your blind date by saying he's sick and sadistic and you perk, god i hope so!

...you think VA stands for Vanilla Anonymous.

...turning the switch on has precious little to do with making the lights come on when you enter the room.

...the first thing you check when looking for a new car is whether the trunk can hold a bound submissive or two.

...you take advantage of the needle exchange program in your city and you have never used intravenous drugs in your entire life.

...you fake injuries just so you can replenish the medical play kit from the ER.

...when you're told your brother-in-law is pussy-whipped, it takes you a moment to realize that doesn't necessarily mean he's transgendered.

...you can accurately convert horsepower to #ponygirls harnessed.

...someone calls your wife a slut and you thank them.

...your favorite letter of the alphabet is O.

...nose to the grindstone is an orgasmic abrasion fantasy.

...you refer to your fully equipped van as "Squeals on Wheels".

...your travel agent recommends a 4 star bed and breakfast as part of your vacation plans; you yawn and ask where the nearest Dungeon and Gruel is to your destination.

...investing in stocks and bonds means refurbishing the play area.

...your children think your primary language is acronyms.

...you have a habit of calling conversion vans perversion vans.

...you overhear your neighbor training his dog to sit, beg, play dead, roll over; and find yourself obeying quicker than the dog does.

...you need to rent a U-Haul to get your toys to the play party.

...your toilet seat is leather.

...your children are named Dom, SAM, Sissy, and Autoerotic Asphyxiation. 

A message from Mr. Anonymous

Anonymous said...
HI, I have been lurking here for a while, but never commented. But this one makes me want to.
First, you are simply brilliant. Perverted and weird, yes (just like most of us), but brilliant for sure. Keep it up.

Second,most if not all your posts are very aesthetically pleasing and tantalizing.

Third, your writing skills are excellent. While I dont have a kindle or other ebook reader, I fully support (for what it is worth) your efforts to monetize your abilities. Good luck.

Fourth, In general your captions on pictures posts are very nice. Very unique and attractive pics. What makes them fundamentally unique is the new angle you portray in the picture. In that sense there is an element of suprise.

Whatever the number, regarding the above post - great attempt. But following the story wasnt easy. As you have to click to each one, go back and click the next one. Perhaps that is the limitation of the blog software platform. But when you want to click the next one, it is not clear which one. Perhaps some numbering would help.

All in all, you are a genius.

Cheers
For now, anonymous.

laura's Memories from the Past

In his teachings “Reading about oneselves from the diary,” Master and teacher Husband recently explained slave laura something that kept nagging her.. this slave had described the experience of encountering a long-forgotten page of her own diary from her cornwall days. As she tells her feelings in the diary, Master Husband agreed to read the diary of her whom he had taught for many years now. When this slave arrived at with the diary in hand kneeling, she brought both her diarys and Masters’ written evaluation of her work carefully folded, which she had saved from her days in his training. Typed on a Microsoft word he was using at the time, Master Husband’ evaluations seemes almost foreign to this slave:

And suddenly there’s this feeling, this slave laura had it before—more and more in recent years. slave laura is reading something she has written and she not only don’t recognize the sentences—they’ve gone from her—she also don’t quite map to the mind that produced them. It’s very much like catching her shopwindow reflection for a split second before she realize it’s her. Almost always, the shock is negative. Does she look like that? With these sentences it’s the opposite. her eyes catch sight of what her hand did. Reading, she actually admires the images, the figures of speech, the confidence of the rhythm. Not the rhythm she would write in now. But she feels it as distinct.

For laura this encounter with her younger self was comparable to contemplating an old photograph. “The looking,” she observes, “is mainly about taking in the differences.”*

slave laura’s anecdote explained by Master Husband vividly illustrates what many people feel in later life: the long trajectory of one’s BDSM experience, the felt discontinuity between one’s earlier self and its present manifestation. But laura’ diary also illustrates a mental faculty that Master Husband defined as “contemplative memory.”** Contrasting this faculty with “motoric” memory, which a musician employs when playing a piece by heart, Master Husband identified three distinguishing components of contemplative memory.

First, the process is spontaneous: memories arise unsummoned, often in the form of images. They are not the result of an act of will. Second, the remembered experience is clearly seen as having occurred at a time and a place in the past. It has a date, and it is unrepeatable. And last, what is most prominent in the remembered experience is the difference between then and now. Training was different then, so were conditions, and so were we, and in remembering the experience, we are not reliving it. Rather, we are viewing the past from the vantage point of the present. When we do so, and when the previous two elements are also present, we are exercising “contemplative” memory, which Master explains as the purest form of memory.

As even a few minutes’ reflection will verify, few of our memories are so pure. In this slave's case, the presence of a tangible diary from the past—a datable, typewritten page—kept her, as it were, on the contemplative track. she had little choice but to view the object of memory as a thing of the past. But in everyday life, the process of remembering is likely to be far more capricious, selective, and faulty. If the remembered experience is emotionally charged, we are more likely to be engulfed by it than to contemplate it in a spirit of disinterested inquiry. If it is a pleasurful memory, we may find ourselves engaging in what psychologists call “therapeutic remembering.” or "creative visualization"  And if the memory has a moral dimension, we may enlist it in the service of self-gratification, or self-glorification, or self-abasement. We may make it a means to an end, serving the ego’s insatiable needs.

In my training over the years, as in other areas of my life, we train ourselves to do what we like the most. By sitting still and following her thoughts, she also follows the flux of her experience. Almost certainly that experience will include passing thoughts, many of them memories or fragments thereof. Some of those memories may be very fond and some erotically titilating. Others may be kind of wrenching like the days in a crate with Gloria. But whatever they happen to be, she trains herself to acknowledge them without dwelling on them, or analyzing them, or allowing herself to be swept away. In the language of the classic texts, she opens herself to the “ten thousands joys” and the “ten thousand orgasms.” But even as she contemplate the past, she must remain grounded in the present—in her upright, stable posture, her full awareness of breathing. In this way she cultivates an intimate but balanced relationship with what she remembers. And over time, this way of relating to the past becomes a way of being, which she can carry from the cushion into her everyday lives.

In this poignant writings, this slave records a moment of awakening, prompted by Master's two-note pavlovian training call. Acutely aware of what is present, laura is also aware of his longing for what is not. What is present is the bygon memories; what is absent is the storied, glorious expeience of earlier orgasms. 

Gorean Slave Positions.

The pictures below depict a kajira who has been generously allowed a loincloth. The kajira at the Chatka & Curla however, are kept naked, for the pleasure of our patrons.

 Nadu - This is the standard position that a kajira assumes when simply commanded to "position". The girl kneels, with her knees wide apart, her hands resting on her thighs. Her back is straight, her head up, with her eyes lowered. Her shoulders are back, which thrusts out her breasts.

 Sula - This position is also called "On your Back". The girl lies on her back, with her legs apart, her arms resting beside her body, with her palms turned upward. This is a common usage position.

 Lesha - The girl assumes this position to be leashed, and braceleted. Her hands are placed side by side, behind her back, and her head is turned to the left, to permit easy access to her collar, for the attachment of the leash.

 Capture - This is the standard position that a Free Woman assumes when captured. It is rarely commanded of slaves, though since many were one Free Women, they know it anyway. The woman so commanded to assume this position, lies on her back, with her knees drawn up, and her arms at her sides. Her legs are together.

 Bara - Here the slave lies on her belly, to permit her to be bound. Her hands are crossed behind her back, and her legs crossed at the ankles. Her head is turned to the left.

 Usage - This is called the position of the she-quadroped, or Common Usage Position. The slave goes to all fours, with her knees apart, and her hands clasped behind the back of her neck. Her ass is thrust upwards. As its name implies, a slve is oftehn commanded to assume this position when her Master desires to use her for his sexual pleasure.

 Obesience - This is a common position of submission, and in it the girl kneels, and bows her upper body forward. Her arms reach out before her head, and her hair is swept forward to leave her back bare. A girl will often assume this position to beg to be whipped, when they have been displeasing.

 Whipping - This is the common position a girl assumes, when she is to be whipped. She kneels, and bows her upper body forward. Her arms are tucked in, covering her breasts, and her hair is swept forward, to leave her back bare, for the whip.

Scary Bible Quotes by God...expert comments by Laura

On Punishing ‘Immorality’
Leviticus 20:9	If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death.
20:10	If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death.
20:13	If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death.
Deuteronomy 22:20-1	If, however, the charge is true and no proof of the girl’s virginity can be found, she shall be brought to the door of her father’s house and there the men of her town shall stone her to death. She has done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while still in her father’s house.
Exodus 35:2	For six days, work is to be done, but the seventh day shall be your holy day, a Sabbath of rest to the LORD. Whoever does any work on it must be put to death.
On Destroying Other People
Deuteronomy 7:1-2	When the Lord your God brings you into the land you are entering to possess and drives out before you many nations . . . then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy.
20:10-17	When you march up to attack a city, make its people an offer of peace. If they accept and open their gates, all the people in it shall be subject to forced labor and shall work for you. If they refuse to make peace and they engage you in battle, lay siege to that city. When the Lord your God delivers it into your hand, put to the sword all the men in it. As for the women, the children, the livestock and everything else in the city, you may take these as plunder for yourselves. . . . This is how you are to treat all the cities that are at a distance from you and do not belong to the nations nearby. However, in the cities of the nations the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance, do not leave alive anything that breathes. Completely destroy them—the Hittites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites—as the Lord your God has commanded you.
On the Evil of Biblical Law
Ezekiel 20:25-26	I also gave them over to statutes that were not good and laws they could not live by; I let them become defiled through their gifts—the sacrifice of every firstborn—that I might fill them with horror so they would know that I am the LORD.
On Slavery & Subjugation of Women
Ephesians 5:22-24	Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Exodus 21:20-21	If a man beats his male or female slave with a rod and the slave dies as a direct result, he must be punished, but he is not to be punished if the slave gets up after a day or two, since the slave is his property.
1 Peter 2:13	Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every authority instituted among men.
2:18	Slaves, submit yourselves to your masters with all respect, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh.
Leviticus 25:44-45	Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves. You may also buy some of the temporary residents living among you and members of their clans born in your country, and they will become your property.
Jesus, on His Second Coming
Matthew 24:29-34	[T]he sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky, and the heavenly bodies will be shaken. . . . They will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of the sky, with power and great glory. . . . I tell you the truth, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. [Emphasis added.]
16:27-28	For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what he has done. I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom.
Scientific Errors
(1) Rabbits don’t chew cud.
Deuteronomy 14:6-7	You may eat any animal that has a split hoof divided in two and that chews the cud. However, of those that chew the cud or that have a split hoof completely divided you may not eat the camel, the rabbit, or the coney.
(2) No insects (including grasshoppers) are 4-legged.
Leviticus 11:20-22	All flying insects that walk on all fours are to be detestable to you. There are, however, some winged creatures that walk on all fours that you may eat: those that have jointed legs for hopping on the ground. Of these you may eat any kind of locust, katydid, cricket or grasshopper.
(3) This is only possible on a flat earth.
Matthew 4:8	Again the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor.
(4) pi does not = 3.
1 Kings 7:23	He made the Sea of cast metal, circular in shape, measuring ten cubits from rim to rim . . . It took a line of thirty cubits to measure around it.
(5) The earth moves. It does not have a foundation.
Psalms 104:5	He set the earth on its foundations; it can never be moved.
Selected Contradictions
(1)
2 Kings 2:11	As they were walking along and talking together, suddenly a chariot of fire and horses of fire appeared and separated the two of them, and Elijah went up to heaven in a whirlwind.
John 3:13	No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven—the Son of Man.
(2)
Numbers 23:19	God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind.
Exodus 32:14	Then the Lord relented and did not bring on his people the disaster he had threatened.
(3)
Ephesians 2:8-9	For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith . . . not by works.
James 2:14-17	What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? . . . Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
Revelation 22:12	Behold, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done.
(4) (Jesus speaking)
Matthew 5:16	Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your father in heaven.
Matthew 6:1	Be careful not to do your ‘acts of righteousness’ before men, to be seen by them.
(5) (Jesus speaking)
John 14:27	Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
Matthew 10:34	Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.
(6)
Genesis 32:30	So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, “It is because I saw God face to face, and my life was preserved.”
Exodus 33:11	The Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend.
John 1:18	No one has ever seen God.
(7) (Jesus speaking)
John 5:31	If I testify about myself, my testimony is not valid.
John 8:14	Even if I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is valid. ----------------------------------- “The degradation which characterizes the state into which you plunge him by punishing him pleases, amuses, and delights him. Deep down he enjoys having gone so far as to deserve being treated in such a way.” ~Marquis de Sade

Hilarious Personal Ad

slave wanted:

My Master is in the market for one of those slave companion things that people keep talking about.

You don’t even have to be bi. I’m not after your pussy. I’m after your domestic goddess-ness.

You’ll have to cook and clean. Not all the time. Just sometimes. I’ll help.

You’ll have to fuck him. Not all the time. Just sometimes. I’ll help with that, too.

You’ll have to be the anal girl. All the time. ~nods~

Requirements:

*Looks: Uglier than me
*Age: Older than me
*Weight: Fatter than me
*Height: Taller than me so you can reach the stuff on the high shelves
*Smarts: Meh. Who cares. I’m not in this for your conversational skillz.
*Sexual talents: Worse than mine, except for anal. Excel in that area plz.

Perks:

Um…

~crickets~

I’m sure we’ll come up with something.

The line starts to the left. Don’t crowd.

Feminism, Wicca, and D/s

Feminism, Wicca, and D/s

    

by Rowan Ste. JulianPosted with the permission of the author

A young lady that I know of through friends recently “came out” of the BDSM closet to her Wiccan coven; she expected support, neutrality, possibly some resistance, and perhaps one or two insults. She wasn´t prepared in the least for the barrage of slander and criticism that she received. Accusations flew: that she wasn´t a real Wiccan, that she was dishonoring the sacred gift of sex, and that she was helping to undermine women´s lib. In brief, she was called a traitor. The end result is that she is embittered against Wicca, and has left her coven for good.

Ironically enough, her BDSM group supported her despite their prior bad experiences with “Wiccan players” who joined to get some kinky sex and nothing else.

I´ve come across a great deal of anti-BDSM sentiment in both the Wiccan and feminist communities, and I find this somewhat surprising considering that the major emphasis by both ideologies is a certain amount of freedom, both from unequal social expectations and from guilt about sexual expression.

Allow me to digress and attempt to explain both Wicca and women´s liberation. Please note that the below are MY interpretations of the two ideologies, and based on my understanding. If you desperately need to flame someone, flame me. I have excellent email blocking.

Wicca is a federally recognized religion that is based on pagan practices of old. There are various traditions. It was officially founded in the thirties by Gardner. In modern-day form, depending on the branch, it emphasizes balance and equality. Dianic Wicca is an offshoot of this and emphasizes female power as tied in with the goddess of old. They tend to be female, and while there are some males in the Dianic tradition, they tend to be more subservient and less emphasized. A great many wiccans believe that females have a deeper tie to the goddess, and neglect the god principle entirely due to anti-Christian angst and hostility towards “patriarchal oppression”.

Women´s lib began in the 1960´s in reaction to growing discontent about social inequality of wages, expectations, and sexual acceptability. While it was acceptable, for instance, for a man to enjoy sex or extramarital affairs, even gaining social status from his peers, a woman who admitted to enjoying sex, rather than viewing it as a chore to be done once a month and ignored the rest of the time, would be ostracized and insulted. A man could make a living wage working outside the home, while a woman was lucky (somewhat) if she could find a job at all. The aim of women´s lib was, originally, to be freed from inequality and experience some FREEDOM.

Every apple tree produces slightly “off” fruit from time to time, though. Women´s lib was misinterpreted: Rather than enjoying heterosexual sex, some libbers would say, view it as a tool of patriarchal society. To be a true libber, you must only experience sexual joys with your sisters in arms. Sexual freedom is only acceptable within boundaries that we draw. Female superiority was often brought up, rather than female equality, and further distorted the movement. Heterosexuality was acceptable so long as the male was subservient, and the woman dominant. All this and more served to make some people hostile towards women´s lib; for example, Rush Limbaugh and his dittoheads made the term “feminazis” popular. Libbers are now often viewed as hairy-legged man-hater lesbians who refused to acknowledge their femininity.

In the efforts to become less oppressed, both Wicca and feminism seem to have become self-repressing. Women are no longer allowed to express joy in the complex pleasure of heterosexual intercourse (again!), and God(s) FORBID that a woman should submit to a male! They seem to have lost sight of the fact that part of the Wiccan attraction is less guilt, not more. They seem to have lost sight of the fact that part of women´s liberation was to gain sexual freedom, both of act and expression, without censure from either peers or outsiders. We should be allowed to say “no”, allowed to say “yes”, allowed to scream “YES YES YES!!!!” Understanding has been lost and replaced by judgmental criticism.

I myself have been witness and privy to this sort of hostility: I am a regular online chat presence in Domination/submission rooms and we are regularly treated to a parade of people, male and female, who misunderstand the lifestyle and try to “free” us or call us traitors due to the fact that we give up control. YES… that control was hard-fought for, but isn´t part of sexual equality having the choice to give UP that control, should that be what pleases us, gives us pleasure, and satisfies our inner cravings?

There are a great many people who view D/s as non-consensual and as license to abuse. They neglect to realize that online, we can turn off the computer, and offline, the D/s community actively polices itself, attempting to bar abusers who forget that the keywords of the lifestyle are “Safe, Sane and Consensual”… not to mention the fact that we do not have to enter the D/s lifestyle in the first place if we don´t wish to!

I met, and married, and had a child with my Master. I have never regretted it, even when times are hard and I am ostracized for having kinky sex. All sex is holy, whether it´s Tantric, done in a stone circle, or involves leather. The only “sin” involved in sex, any sex, is dishonesty and the use of the act to hurt in a non-consensual manner. My openness about my part in the lifestyle is necessary in my view to win it any acceptance at all… even if it´s just to be left alone. We are harassed by the police who have a poor image of the lifestyle and too much power for their own good sometimes, judges who view us with hostility and encourage our peers to view us as monsters, and the media who is less interested in honesty rather than sensationalism. Those who fight for freedom need to caution themselves against becoming inquisitors; the rack is for pleasurable torment now, not for attempts to change people into someone you can freely accept with no mental effort on your part.

If women´s liberation or Wicca insists on holding the view that sexual freedom does not include the freedom to choose slavery, theses two ideologies become no better than the societal mores they were founded to fight in the first place; in actuality, they´re worse, because they preach freedom and pretend to superiority that they don´t practice. There is every bit as much freedom in being a heterosexual female slave as being a lesbian Mistress; understanding this is the key to becoming a true women´s libber, or an honest wiccan.

Laura hypnotised...

Laura was a sub girl. She always had been, deep down; had always felt a burning need to surrender to her partner’s wishes. She felt complete and content doing exactly what she was told. She loved kinky sex, she loved being bound and helpless, and she loved the feeling of exposed, helpless submission. Laura craved to be dominated.
However, she always felt like she was holding something back. She loved role play in the bedroom, but the idea of total submission, giving herself to another person, was beyond where she would draw the line. The thought of total submission made her shiver with both fear and exhilaration – Laura sometimes imagined what it might be like, but the thought scared her a little.
So, when she found a book on hypnosis which she assumed belonged to her boyfriend, she was a bit concerned. They had discussed it, but Laura had said she was a hesitant about the idea, so finding an obviously well-read book just lying there on the shelf was surprising.
Laura sat with it on the couch and flicked through it, skimming chapters on inductions, deepeners, post-hypnotic suggestions. It was all here, and the thought of herself acting out with her control, doing only what her hypnotic master commanded, rose unbidden in her mind.
Laura thought hypnosis was hot, but that was just fantasy; in real life she knew she had to keep her guard up when she submitted, just a bit, that she couldn’t let herself go totally. Hypnosis seemed to be something that would push her too far into submissiveness.
Laura thought that any dom/sub relationship could get difficult if her submissive nature was too overt outside the bedroom, as perhaps some of her relationships had been in the past. With her current relationship she had the balance just right – her boyfriend’s willing, owned pet in bed, and only in bed. Otherwise, they were just a normal couple. She didn’t see how being totally submissive could ever be compatible with real life.
But sexually they had tried many things, and discussed much more. Bondage was a favourite, as the physical manifestation of submission never failed to get Laura hot, whether she was gagged or bound or collared or all three. She liked to see herself like that, reflected in the mirror, her lips stretched over a ball gag, her curly brown hair lying over the tight leather strap, and her large, bouncy F-cup breasts held in place by a strap underneath them, causing them to jut out wantonly, ready to be toyed with or even slapped and pinched until they shone red, her hard nipples betraying how horny she became when she was used and dominated.
But, hypnosis was in the other category; things they had discussed but never tried. If offered a tantalising way to go deeper, become more submissive than ever before, perhaps be physically unable to resist – but that was just a fantasy, Laura repeated to herself, no matter how hot it was.
Laura waited for her boyfriend to arrive that evening, and as soon as he did she brandished the book, demanding an explanation. Quite openly and calmly he said yes, hypnosis was something he might like to try; “I’m not sure…” Laura said doubtfully.
“I’ve been reading all about it, it’ll be really hot,” he said, “let’s try it once;” he insisted, shrugging, “and if you don’t like it we don’t have to try it again. I promise.”
That reasonable to Laura; she didn’t want to let him down, and even though she was a little apprehensive, the thought of being entranced and ordered to submit made her feel a glowing warmth between her legs. “I don’t know… maybe,” she replied, and they left the subject at that.
* * *
That evening, as they kissed in bed, he brought up the subject again; “how about tonight?” Laura nervously nodded agreement; here in the bedroom she felt more submissive, and she told herself she could try it once and see what it was like.
“Ok,” he said, shifting position and guiding her down by the shoulders, onto her back.
“Lie quite still, concentrate on breathing slowly and deeply, and relax,” he added, detecting Laura’s lingering concerns. “You won’t do anything under hypnosis that you aren’t comfortable with,” he said, “all hypnosis is really self-hypnosis.”
“Yes sir,” said Laura, referring to him by his usual bedroom title, and he smiled as he began to speak in a soothing, mellow voice…
Laura drifted, feeling as if she was sinking into sleep but held on the cusp between consciousness and unconsciousness, and when she finally felt herself rouse she had no idea how long she’d been out.
“Wow,” she said, looking up at her boyfriend’s face, which bore a slight grin. “What happened?”
“It worked, you were hypnotised,” he said.
“What did you do to me,” she asked.
“You really can’t remember?” he said, slightly incredulously. “For a first-timer, that’s impressive. What I did was put you in a basic trance, and left you a little post-hypnotic suggestion.” He grinned.
“What was it,” said Laura, intrigued by the mystery of what he’d told her to do while she was in trance, partly turned on and partly worried. But less worried that before, as if she’d gotten over the worst of her fears. It hadn’t been so bad, really.
“Are you hot?” her boyfriend asked.
“Yes sir,” Laura answered eagerly. He was already on top of her, so he positioned himself between her spread legs. The hypnosis had gotten them both aroused and ready, his cock erect and her pussy wet and glistening. Tonight they didn’t need bondage gear, or role play, they just needed each other, naked and hot, him on top and her below.
He thrust his hips again and again, driving his cock deep into her until they both panted in ecstasy, her big breasts bouncing with every stroke. At the moment of orgasm Laura’s mind revealed her post-hypnotic trigger – she opened her mouth and found herself compelled to shout “I will obey my master!”
The surprise and the sudden feeling of helpless submission that coursed through her as she felt compelled to speak the words from her own subconscious made Laura shudder with the same force and pleasure as if she’d had a second orgasm, reigniting the dying embers of the first.
Her buckling, spasming pussy around her boyfriend’s cock drove him over the edge and he came inside her, his face a picture of lust and dominance as he looked down at his obedient girlfriend, dutifully repeating her lines exactly as her exposed, hypnotised mind had been instructed.
As the orgasm faded, they collapsed into each other’s arms; “Good girl,” he said. “Did you enjoy that?”
“Yeah,” she panted. “Hypnotise me again tomorrow, sir, please,” she said softly.
“I will,” he replied.
* * *
The next night, Laura was hypnotised again. She went deeper, quicker, and again woke with no memory of what had transpired. Her boyfriend wore that same amused grin as her eyelids fluttered open and she focussed on his face, and he kissed her forehead.
“Any idea what happened when I put you under?” he asked.
“No sir,” Laura admitted.
He laughed; “no? What about if I told you that you were a good girl?”
“I will obey my master,” Laura said immediately. She blinked. “Hey!” she said, “Did you make me say that?”
“Don’t worry, it’ll wear off,” he said, adding; “eventually. Good girl.”
“I will obey my master,” Laura repeated automatically. She blushed to hear herself say it again, triggered by his words. She also felt a spread of warmth at her crotch; knowing that she was submitting sub-consciously as well as consciously.
“I changed your post-hypnotic suggestion a little,” he explained. “You like it, good girl?” he asked.
“I will obey my master,” Laura replied, adding “yeah, it’s kind of hot.”
“I knew you’d like it.” He said. “Now that I’ve done something you like, it’s time for you to return the favour; suck my cock,” he ordered.
Laura obeyed, sinking down to take his erect cock between her parting lips. She was his submissive slave in bed, after all, and this was an every-day command she was accustomed to obeying. However, as she bobbed her head up and down, licking and sucking attentively, she heard her boyfriend say “good girl.”
“Ah wull obeh mah mastuh,” she said indistinctly, her mouth full of his hard cock. As she obeyed her trigger phrase his cock twitched in her mouth, this clearly turned him on.
“Masturbate, good girl,” he said, and she gave a muffled reply as her hand reached down between her legs. She was so wet already that she easily slipped a finger between her pussy lips to her clit. She moaned.
“Good girl,” he said.
“Uh wull obeh muh mastuh,” she mumbled thickly, wrapping her tongue around the head of his cock to suck on it in the same rhythm with which she fingered herself.
Laura heard her boyfriend say, “I’m cumming,” and groan with pleasure as she redoubled her efforts to suck his cock far into her mouth and hold the shaft firm between her stretched lips. He shot a load of thick, hot cum into her mouth, and Laura held it in the back of her mouth, waiting for the command to swallow. She always did; he liked it that way, and she considered it the most elegant solution to the dilemma of what to do with a mouthful of sperm.
“Swallow,” came the predicted order, and Laura gulped it down. As it slid down her throat she had a sudden thought; what if he triggered her now; she’d gag on the cum in her throat. She had to obey, and it would make her choke and splutter. The helplessness of her situation hit her, which made her pussy tighten around her fingers.
He wasn’t so cruel. He waited until she had swallowed before stroking her hair and saying; “good girl.”
“I will obey my master,” she replied clearly.
He smiled, before rolling over and watching her lying next to him, legs spread and hand buried between them, her face a lustful mixture of obedience and pleasure. She stopped, her hand resting on her thigh, and looked to him for permission to go on.
“Continue,” he said, sliding over to take one of her nipples into his mouth. The friction from his tongue and teeth made Laura shiver, and as he licked at her nipples and she slid another finger into her pussy she began to feel her orgasm building.
Laura felt her nipple fall from his mouth as he repositioned himself so his face was level with hers. She looked up into his eyes, and they gazed at each other as she toyed with herself.
“You going to cum soon?” he asked.
“Uh huh,” she replied, biting her lip.
“Good girl,” he said.
“I will obey my master,” she panted.
“Good girl,” he said again, and her conditioned reply came back immediately.
“I will obey my master.”
They lay there, staring at each other, him repeating “good girl,” and her helplessly repeating “I will obey my master.” She just couldn’t help herself, and that thought drove her over the edge. She moaned in orgasm, the single, lustful cry broken only due to her boyfriend quietly saying; “good girl,” and her instant response.
As the last delicious waves of orgasm faded, Laura relaxed. Her boyfriend stroked her face as they both faded towards sleep. “Good night, good girl,” he said.
“I will obey my master,” she mumbled back tiredly, as they both slipped into sleep.
* * *
The next morning Laura woke refreshed and happy; last night had been the second night in a row where she had felt absolutely turned on by submitting to hypnosis. Her boyfriend had been right; it was great, and she was satisfied that it added a lot to their bedroom sub/dom relationship without affecting them otherwise.
However, Laura was surprised at her reply when her boyfriend stirred next to her and softly said; “Last night was great, you were such a good girl.”
“I will obey my master,” she said. “Hey, I thought you said that it would wear off!”
“It will,” he said soothingly. “It’ll wear off when you want it too.”
“I don’t know…” Laura said, and her fears came to the surface. “You know I don’t want hypnosis to affect our relationship,” she explained. “And I’m just worried about all these post-hypnotic suggestions, whether they’re going to make me behave differently.”
“Don’t worry,” he said, wrapping an arm around her, “hypnosis can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do.”
“And the “I will obey my master” thing?” Laura demanded.
“It will probably wear off later today,” he said, shrugging. “The sooner you want it to wear off, the sooner it will. Hypnosis can’t make you do anything you don’t want to,” he repeated. “Plus, you can’t be hypnotised if you don’t want to be, and if you don’t want to be hypnotised again then we can stop.”
“Okay,” said Laura, satisfied. She didn’t know if she wanted to end this new phase in their relationship, but was glad to hear him she could decide whether she was comfortable with it.
She was relieved, although now that Laura thought about it properly she realised that her fears probably were misguided; she recalled hearing that hypnosis couldn’t make a subject do anything she didn’t want to. I suppose I must just want that trigger to still work, she thought; it makes me hot, after all. She stopped worrying about it an got on with her day.
Throughout the day, Laura wondered if the trigger would still work. She tried saying “good girl,” quietly to herself which had no effect, but she expected it needed to be her boyfriend saying the line anyway. For a while the mystery worried her a little, but as the day went on the thought began to turn her on again.
Eventually, after hours of wondering at the back of her mind if she was still following her conditioning, she realised that she hoped she was. The thought made her a little bit wet, picturing herself submissively parroting the phrase whenever she heard her trigger. She ran her teeth over her lip, lightly biting it, as she thought about how much it had turned her on last night.
Her conclusion; what was the harm in a bit of hypnosis when they both enjoyed it so much. And like her boyfriend said, she could stop any time she wanted. If it got too much she could stop letting him put her into a trance.
That night, in bed, Laura told her boyfriend about her realisation.
He agreed; they both enjoyed using hypnosis in their relationship, so there was no reason to stop using it.
He smiled, and Laura realised that she must look expectant. She had been waiting for him to say the trigger phrase, and she knew that he knew it. He exhaled slowly, sitting back, watching her lightly biting her lip and waiting patiently. The silence stretched out until he levelly asked; “What are you waiting for?”
“I want you to say… you know…” Laura said, a little embarrassed to be asking for him to call her a good girl, particularly after her misgivings about it that morning.
“Your trigger phrase?” he asked. “Is that what you want me to say?”
“Yes sir,” she replied, blushing.
Her boyfriend reached out, removing the straps of Laura’s bra and pulled out her large, round breasts by her nipples. She gasped a little in pain and pleasure. He tweaked her nipples, and pulled the two huge orbs round in slow circles. Laura compliantly allowed him to do this, she was his submissive. Usually this rough, dominant treatment would turn her on, but tonight she was distracted, all she wanted was to hear her trigger phrase.
“You want me to say your trigger phrase,” he mused, almost rhetorically. Laura nodded, and he brought the flat of his hand down across her breast in a slap, causing her to straighten her back and gasp in surprise. It jiggled around her chest, swaying to and fro from the impact.
“Say “Yes, sir” when I ask you a question,” he scolded her.
“Sorry sir, yes sir,” she said, hanging her head. Normally she would remember, but tonight she was so distracted.
He pinched her hard nipples, making her moan with arousal. He held them until they throbbed with pain, and when he finally released them they flashed with another wave of pain as the blood rushed back into them. He eventually said; “I told you he trigger would wear off if you wanted it to, so why do you want me to say it? Is it because you want to check if the conditioning has worn off, or is it because you love the feeling that being my submissive hypnotised slave gives you?”
“The second one, sir,” Laura replied truthfully, needing to hear her trigger.
He smiled again, drawing out the wait that little bit longer, before saying softly into her ear; “good girl.”
“I will obey my master!” she blurted out, gasping from the delight that coursed through her knowing that she was still following her post-hypnotic instructions a full day later.
“Good girl,” he said, chuckling at her enthusiastic response.
“I will obey my master,” she said again, more slowly and deliberately this time, revelling in the feelings of submission she felt as she heard every inevitable word come from her mouth.
“Do you want me to hypnotise you again?”
“Yes sir,” she replied with certainty.
“Tonight, I am going to do things a little differently,” he said, and Laura nodded.
“What I am going to do will make you more devoted to my wishes, more malleable to my commands, and it will make the pleasure you feel from obeying and submitting to me much greater – after tonight, when I say your trigger you will feel a glow of glorious submission and arousal,” he added.
Laura sighed with happiness at the thought.
“But I need you to agree to let me take you deeper than ever before, condition you under hypnosis for a long, continuous period of time, until you are able to slip into trance at my word of command. Once you agree, I will proceed with your hypnotic training.”
Laura hesitated; that sounded more serious. She had been relying on the fact that she could choose not to submit at any time as a known limit to her comfort zone; if that choice was removed she would be vulnerable, exposed to his commands. She shivered, partly from trepidation and partly from arousal at the thought of submitting even more, and feeling the pleasure that came from simple, single-minded obedience.
“I won’t do anything under hypnosis I don’t want to do, right?” Shell asked uneasily.
“That’s right; you will only follow commands that, deep down, you know are right for you,” he confirmed.
Laura took a deep breath, now sure of her decision; “okay, I agree.”
“Tell me exactly what you agree to,” he said.
“I agree to let you hypnotise me to deepen my trigger phrase and give me a new trigger that lets you put me into a trance whenever you command.”
“Good girl.”
“I will obey my master,” she said contentedly, as he began to speak softly, quickly, whispering into her ear as she felt herself relaxing and drifting off into trance…
* * *
… Laura woke up the next morning feeling wonderful. Well rested, energised, and sexually aroused. As she awoke though, al those feelings were joined by confusion. Why couldn’t she remember last night, and why was she wearing headphones.
She sat up in bed and slipped them off, knitting her brow as she struggled to recall anything after she had agreed to be hypnotised. Her movement caused her boyfriend to stir.
“What happened last night?” asked Laura.
“You have been in trance for eight hours,” he replied, and Laura gaped in astonishment. She felt like she had been asleep, but as she couldn’t remember anything since she had felt herself drifting into trance he must be right.
“And these?” she added, holding up the headphones.
“Trance deepener,” he replied, “I couldn’t stay up all night talking, so I gave you the deepening MP3 to listen to, over and over again.”
“Did it work?” asked Laura, who felt no different to how she’d felt the previous morning, just a little more aroused and much calmer about any commands her mind may have been conditioned to follow.
“Want to find out?” he asked.
“Yes sir,” she replied.
“Good girl,” he said, and Laura let out a shuddering breath as she felt a mixture of pride, submission and arousal at being called a good girl.
“I will obey my master,” she said, as she knew she must. She paused for breath, then said, “That was wonderful, thank you sir.”
Her boyfriend nodded acknowledgement.
“And the other thing, the sleep command?” Laura asked, feeling more nervous about this aspect of her conditioning.
“Let’s find out, sleepy girl,” he said…
… and Laura woke up. Her boyfriend was dressed, sitting by the bedside, and slipping on his shoes.
“Does that answer your question?” he asked.
“Yes sir,” said Laura, awed by the power he now had over her and feeling the heat between her legs. Sitting up, she let the covers slip from her large, pale breasts and stretched, causing them to wobble and drift apart as she stretched her shoulders. She ran her fingers over her nipples.
“You know, sir,” she said, “we didn’t get a chance to do anything last night, since the hypnosis took so long, so maybe we could…” she tailed of, lifting her breasts in her hands and tilting her head so that her curly hair spilled from her shoulders.
“Not now,” he said, “I have to get to work.”
Laura moaned plaintively, but her boyfriend ignored her arousal, simply bending to kiss her on the lips and say; “Later, if you’re a good girl.” He then left the room as she called after him; “I will obey my master!” and felt the wave of pleasure that went with it.
When he’d gone, Laura decided that she needed release anyway. She’d woken up horny, and being repeatedly triggered had only made her hotter and wetter.
She threw the covers from the bed and lay back, her hand immediately dropping to her hungry pussy, her fingers coated in wetness almost instantly as they rubbed up and down with wonderful friction. She thought of submitting to her boyfriend as her fingers expertly flicked and teased at her clit. She moaned first with pleasure but then with frustration as she realised that she wasn’t getting herself any closer to orgasm.
Her fingers rubbed at her pussy, sliding into her until her pussy lips were puffy and red and her fingers were getting sore, but she still couldn’t seem to make herself cum. She groaned, and reluctantly stopped trying. She had to leave for the day, and her boyfriend’s sleep command demonstration and her pointless masturbation had already made her late.
As she showered, Laura wondered why she had not been able to orgasm. She supposed it was because she was in a rush to leave, and was still tired, and had nothing to do with her post-hypnotic suggestions. She had vaguely wondered if was that, but the thought washed away as easily as water down the drain. Besides, she was sure her boyfriend would be eager to experiment with her newly reinforced “good girl” command that night, and she would be permitted to cum then.
Not that she wasn’t permitted to cum now, she thought. Or was she? No, that was silly. She was just in a rush to leave, that was all. It had nothing to do with permission. She and her boyfriend had experimented with orgasm denial before, using pain and pleasure in bondage to keep her just on the edge, but this was different; hypnosis couldn’t make her do anything she didn’t want to, and she would remember if she had been told she couldn’t have an orgasm. Surely.
Satisfied, Laura went about her day. But all the way from morning to evening she felt a constant gnawing arousal, making her rub her thighs together throughout the day, biting her lip as the pleasure grew, and sighing in relief as she spread her legs and let a little cool air in to make her feel a little less aroused. She was glad she had worn a skirt without panties, as it gave her better access to her pussy when she simply had to reach down and give herself a few wonderful strokes.
But she still couldn’t cum, and her pleasure built throughout the day so that when her boyfriend arrived that evening she threw herself at him, drawing him in a tight embrace and kissing him passionately.
“I’ve been so hot all day,” she said sultrily, smiling and pushing her body into his, pressing her breasts into his chest so he could feel her stiff nipples and would know how turned on she was.
“I know you have,” he said, and Laura wondered how he knew. She had convinced herself that it wasn’t a post-hypnotic suggestion, but how else could he have known?
“Sir, how did you -?” she began.
“Shush,” he said firmly, cutting her off, and kissed her lips. When he broke off he didn’t give her the chance to draw her breath before he said; “good girl,” and all thoughts of orgasm denial were forgotten as Laura flushed with arousal responded to her trigger;
“I will obey my master.”
“I know you will,” he said, and broke off from her embrace. “Strip for me,” he ordered.
Laura was his submissive, and she knew when he wanted to be dominant. It felt even easier to follow his instructions tonight, so natural, and the lust she felt was so great that she would have done anything he asked of her if it meant that she would be pleasing her master, and if she might get the orgasm she needed so much.
Laura began to strip slowly, provocatively, until her boyfriend said “quickly,” and she scrambled to remove everything as fast as she could. She soon stood entirely naked before him, hands by her sides and her clothes in a pile at her feet. While she stripped her boyfriend had left the room, and when he re-entered he was carrying their box of bondage gear with him. Laura bit her lip in anticipation of a mind-blowing evening of sub/dom sex. He noticed her eyes fixed on the box.
“Good girl,” he said.
“I will obey my master,” she blurted out, her mind still feeling the need to rush. Her boyfriend held out his closed hand in front of her face and opened it to reveal a shiny black ball gag.
“Open,” he said, and Laura’s jaw dropped obediently. He pushed it into her waiting mouth, then stepped behind her and secured it so her lips were wide over the shiny silicone. Laura then heard the slick sound of leather being adjusted, and felt a cold collar sliding around her neck. Although she kept her head up, out of the bottom of her field of view she could see and feel the collar’s leash falling down between her breasts.
“Good girl,” he breathed into her ear.
“Uh ull uheh mu muhtuh,” was now all she could manage in reply, causing her to feel the warm drip of drool trickling out between the gag and her bottom lip. She felt so submissive, so controlled, and so hot, that her legs now wobbling with the pleasure she felt every time she restated her obedience. Her boyfriend noticed, and took her leash in his hand, his hands brushing her nipple as it found the leash and making Laura moan even from this light touch.
He yanked the leash and Laura stepped forward, allowing herself to be walked into the bedroom. He pulled more firmly to make her bend at the back, and then pushed her onto the bed. She bounced and then lay there, patiently awaiting further instruction – which came as soon as her boyfriend was ready.
“Arms up,” he said, expertly tying her presented wrists to the headboard, then “legs apart” was followed up by securing her ankles to the bedposts. She was soon fixed in the spread-eagle position, so open and available, gag jutting from her mouth and collar keeping her neck straight and eyes facing upward.
“Good girl,” he said.
“Uh ull uhuh muh uthtuh,” she gurgled again through the gag, gasping with desire as she received her subconscious wave of pleasure.
She felt him get down on his knees between her legs, then stretch up so his arms framed her head and so his cock was poised above her achingly hot, wet pussy. He guided it into her pussy, just the head, and paused. He waited there for what felt like hours, and all she could hear was his and her breath and the beating of her heart, until he suddenly thrust forward.
She moaned into the gag, letting out all of her pent-up need in a continuous exhalation which extended over a number of his powerful thrusts, punctuating the sigh with little whimpers as the force jolted her up and down the bed.
He kept going, every stroke making Laura feel so fulfilled, so gloriously submissive and so wonderfully dominated. She felt like cumming but couldn’t, and being kept on the edge was making every breath cum out as a whine, edged with frustrated lust.
He pulled back, his cock sliding out of her pussy with a wet sucking sound. Laura felt like crying out in disappointment, but jumped as she felt a cold metal object replacing the cock in her pussy. It was a vibrator, which buzzed into life, soon warming up within her flesh and bringing her back to the impassable edge of orgasm in seconds.
She felt her boyfriend’s cock slide between her big f-cup breasts, and felt his hands drawing them around his shaft as he began to slide up and down. His hands pinched and squeezed her nipples, the shivers of pain radiating across her breasts and keeping her right on that edge.
He grunted, his cock twitching and spurting a thick blast of semen up her chest and onto her collar and neck; a little landed on the gag, wobbling on the smooth black ball. As he came he pinched her nipples tighter, and she screamed into the gag – it was wonderful, unbelievably erotic pain, different to the wet, buzzing pleasure in her pussy but uniting with it perfectly.
“Doesn’t this feel great?” her boyfriend asked, panting, looking down at her flushed face and chest, shiny with a slick coat of perspiration and now glistening with strands of his cum.
“Uth thur,” she replied.
“And do you want to cum?” he asked, teasingly.
“Uth thur!” she confirmed desperately.
“You are under a post-hypnotic command,” he told her, “that means you can’t cum until I give you permission.”
Laura knew now that her suspicions, in the back of her mind all day, were true. She should have been bothered by this, she thought vaguely, but she just wasn’t. Not anymore. If giving up control over when to cum meant she could feel so fantastically submissive and aroused then she just didn’t care about losing her choice in the matter.
“I am going to take your gag out,” said his voice from above her. “And when I do I want you to tell me whether you want to cum – just a yes or no. But if you get to cum, you have to agree for me to hypnotise you deeper than ever before, make you more submissive, and make you accept all of my post-hypnotic commands. You have to agree to listen to hypnosis audio every night for this to happen. So, do you want to cum, and accept this? Yes or no?”
Perhaps if Laura had been able to think about anything except the burning need to have an orgasm she would have considered the repercussions about agreeing to this, but when she felt her boyfriend’s fingers freeing the strap at the back of her neck she only had one word at the tip of her tongue.
“Yes!” She yelled, hoarse from her constant moaning, and eyes rolling back as she felt her body responding, closer to the edge of cumming than ever before. She looked up, longing for his word of permission.
“Tell me you need to be my hypnotised slave,” he said calmly.
“I need to be your hypnotised slave!” she shouted back urgently.
“Cum now,” he said, and she let it all out. She squirmed, her pussy finally spasming around the vibrator which had practically turned her clit numb – but now the feeling was back, magnified many times in the waves or orgasm, hitting her over and over with such pleasure that she felt almost unable to draw breath into her gasping lungs.
Her restraints were pulled taut as she twitched and flopped around the bed, her stomach arching as she rode the vibrator and her boyfriend twisted her hard nipples.
Eventually, slowly, her orgasm receded, and she slumped on the bed. She felt the restraints being removed, then the collar, until she lay naked and panting on the ruffled bedsheets. Her boyfriend straddled her upper body, his cock now resting on her pink breasts, and pushed her hair away from her ears.
“Time for you to enter the next stage of your training,” he said, placing the earphones around her head. He looked into her eyes, half-closed from the peaceful aftermath of the explosive orgasm she had just experienced, and whispered “Sleepy girl.”
Her conscious mind switched off instantly, and her subconscious mind listened.